Oh, Bob. GEORGE: Brown. On a regular basis, JT Rozzero, Aaron George, Andrew Flanagan, Jordan Duncan and Jason Greenhouse will watch an episode of TV’s greatest sitcom and provide notes and grades across a number of categories. Kramer does not respond. JERRY: What d'you call it? "Seinfeld" The Friars Club (TV Episode 1996) cast and crew credits, including actors, actresses, directors, writers and more. JERRY: (to George) That might be the stupidest thing you've ever said. I'll try and de-sour and sweeten. Kramer passes Jerry on his way to the kitchen. from JERRY: Ouf. Season 7 of Seinfeld was originally broadcast from the fall of 1995 to the spring of 1996. Looking for a great gift idea for the holidays? is GEORGE: Ah. Seinfeld (1989) - S07E18 The Friars Club - Yarn is the best way to find video clips by quote. puts the jacket down on a table, as he and Jerry begin to hasten. GEORGE: No, I uh... Kramer stops, with the door open, and turns back to Jerry. [Theatre] Well, let's hope this evening turns out a little better. See, that means 'from Vinci', d'you know that? Something on the floor catches her eye. KRAMER: Oh, boy. The audience clap, as do George, Susan and Hallie. I don't think so! Elaine turns back to her computer. [Beneath The Hudson River] [Peterman Bathroom] Including T-Shirts, DVDs, and more! head PETERMAN: (louder still) Copy-editing! Are these fantastic, huh? JERRY: Just imagine how much more you'll accomplish. two guys in the Muppets). The Sandos Brothers set off running after Jerry and George. It's June. garbage. JERRY: She did? George, Susan and Hallie sit in a box overlooking the stage (just like Jerry loses a jacket he "borrowed" for dinner at the Friars Club. JERRY: Well, it was either you or one of your brothers. Peterman decides he should withdraw, and he leaves. JERRY: Bob. Directed by: Andy Ackerman . anything. She wipes the earpiece on the lapel of ELAINE: (dropping the sexy voice) Anything getting through? SANDOS BROTHER 1: No, it is not. It's almost like she doesn't wanna be seen with me. JERRY: Bob. KRAMER: Watch out, boy. Bob smiles, and holds his tie, as if he's been complimented on it. SANDOS BROTHER 1: (to Jerry) Can't argue with that. George Kramer heads for the door. Elaine cocks her head on one You're so damn...sexy. Bob looks delighted to be ensconced with Elaine. Suddenly, the contents begin to hearing aid out of his ear and manipulates it before slipping it back I feel like Lincoln. Broke up with her boyfriend. A number of executives are seated round a table, with J Peterman at the real. And, I thought, for where he climbs from the shoulders into the box containing Jerry, George, dinner Jerry and Bob give embarrassed acknowledgement smiles. Jerry, George, Susan and Hallie, sit round a table, eating. and climb back in. so KRAMER: HEY!! as if I didn't get married. What the hell went wrong? little early, so you both can get ready. Jerry sits, reading a paper, at the table. Check out our complete Seinfeld Gift Guide right now! GEORGE: (smiling) Ho ho. Bob slowly gets to his feet. of the box. She sighs, frustrated at being all gets dumped on me. her The Jerry's opening monologue. couple of bits of card. There's a definite Jerry pulls a face, helps himself to a sandwich and sits down, as Elaine ELAINE: Mr Peterman, you... ELAINE: (hopeful) And? I need it to become a member. on. JERRY: That was something. a PAT: (interrupting) Then what am I talking to you for? GEORGE: June. Jerry and George stand where they dealt with the maitre d' on their previous HALLIE: Yeah. JERRY: (aghast) Four in the morning?! my What happened to you?! Europe mostly. GEORGE: Sure, sure, sure, sure. attire. (enthusiastic) If this works out, forget about it. SANDOS BROTHER 1: No, it is not. You take my word for it. Jerry is looking around for the jacket, lifting cushions, etc. KRAMER: (smiling) Oh, I got a hopper. JERRY: (downcast) Oh, I'm sorry. JERRY: You think he's faking? As Jerry walks up to his door, Kramer's door opens and two guys emerge JERRY: (worked up) Wh..what kinda show is that Sandos Brothers? There is a knock at the door. JERRY: (indifferent) Yeah, we'll see. GEORGE: I told you. Elaine looks distinctly unenthused at the prospect of spending the evening Room 3' opens and Hallie emerges and watches the struggle. Are you in showbusiness? JERRY: Come on. cops. It's you! [Elaine's Office, J. Peterman] as good GEORGE: I, uh, oh, broke a shoelace today. JERRY: Right. JERRY: Breakfast? BOB: Thank you. GEORGE: This is very exciting. ELAINE: Listen, there is something really suspicious about this guy. Pat Cooper walks away from the guys. SUSAN: Do it. It's gotta be here somewhere. SUSAN: (to Hallie) What do you think about having fish for the wedding? gypsies! Come on, Jerry. He Kramer breaks the surface with a splutter. The waitress walks by the table with the coffee pot. PETERMAN: And I know you wouldn't be just having fun with his handicap. GEORGE: Don't be soured. KRAMER: Yeah, well, turns out that the master slept only twenty minutes Okay, bye. BOB: Hey Elaine. Just the four of us. KRAMER: Well, what am I gonna do? Summary: Jerry is being sponsored for membership to the Friars' Club, but things go awry when he accidentally walks off with their jacket. ELAINE: So what? sandwich and a diet soda on her desk. and KRAMER: I'm bored. [Monk's] down the hall. JERRY: Yeah. [Friars Club Restaurant] Elaine picks it up, and it occurs to her that Bob? I'll get the jacket back. They're stealing jackets here! saddled George. the Mm-mmm, Cosmo. [Theatre] Here is your resource for finding exact quotes, script information, and episode play-by-plays. butter and jelly. Panicky, Connie tries again to lift Kramer enough to get out, but is unable Lively music begins and the Flying Sandos Brothers bound onto the stage Here, we feature every single Seinfeld episode. 04, 1996. So, uh, Jerry, there's an empty apartment in my building. (comes in) This is evolutionary. JERRY: What? (throwing Bob back between the seats) Kramer enters the room quietly PAT: (dubious) You forgot to take it off? Okay. Elaine looks confused. JERRY: (passing Hallie) 'Scuse me. MAITRE D': Yes, Mr Seinfeld, but uhm, all gentlemen are required to wear her BOB: (apologetic) I..I'm sorry. As such, he stays awake for more of the day and lives a "longer" life than his peers. I'm starting to unbutton. George, Susan and Hallie, all make positive noises and comments. Oh my god, I thought you were... GEORGE: If I could talk to the guy for just a sec... GEORGE: (animated) What're you kidding me? has the opportunity she wanted. Norman Large (Detective) him. GEORGE: Yeah. for another go. JERRY: (taking the jacket) Thank you. KRAMER: (prodding Jerry) C'mon buddy. GEORGE: No. Find the exact moment in a TV show, movie, or music video you want to share. Jerry motions for George to leave George begins trotting down the street. They're engage GEORGE: What's he yelling about? her, twirling her round. Jerry goes into the bedroom. ELAINE: (sarcasm) Alright, good job. time-honoured musical fashion. Elaine leans over to the guy sitting on the other side of her from Bob. Robert Martin Robinson (Maitre 'd) Jerry is trying to get into the Friars Club, but loses a jacket he "borrowed" for dinner there, at a performance of comedic jugglers that was "worked on" by Susan's friend. GEORGE: Moose? I never heard of that! JERRY: (indicates the bowl of cereal) No milk? "Seinfeld" The Friars Club subtitles. Check out our complete Seinfeld Gift Guide right now! JERRY: It doesn't even belong to me. the equivalent of a hundred and five years. ELAINE: (pushing Bob away) Get offa me! Jerry is trying to get into the Friars Club, but loses a jacket he "borrowed" for dinner there, at a performance of comedic jugglers that was "worked on" by Susan's friend. Help! Elaine is sitting wearing the earpiece when the alarm sounds. HALLIE: Yeah. Bob continues his necessary business. It GEORGE: (forced buoyancy) Hey, you know, let's call Susan, we'll go have She has a making small talk. Jerry smiles gave it The 7 - 21. If you need to know what happens through a season-by-season snapshot, be sure to check it out. GEORGE: Yeah. KRAMER: Yeah, what time is it? I forgot to give it back. slack She reaches across to the table and grabs the The episode was written by David Mandel. Still no reaction. He looks round, panicky and She SUSAN: Aww, that's too bad. A page for Seinfeld fans. GEORGE: June, June, June. (claps hands) So, let's go get some coffee, huh? Vacations together, movies together, dinner together. paperwork, which she rummages through. word you said. Bob stands at the urinal. the edge of the box, after the jacket. With Jerry Seinfeld, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Michael Richards, Jason Alexander. fancy Friars Club. Elaine realises what Peterman overheard. JERRY: That was him? Kramer tries to duplicate the sleeping patterns of Da Vinci and falls asleep at some inopportune moments; one of which puts him put in the Hudson River. He acknowledges a passerby and with Bob. KRAMER: (dismissive) Ahh. ELAINE: Did you see that? Shii! [Street, New York] store, JERRY: The other thing I love is when you're in the middle of a dream, leaves. Elaine struggles with him again. [Friars Club Lobby] It mighta been on the Hallie. Funny. GEORGE: What? stage, JERRY: (louder) Bob! (NOTE: Opening monologue is missing) [Setting: Night club] (Jerry is just now getting done with his act) JERRY: Thank you! (panicky) We'll leave it here for you! JERRY: (deadpan) That must be some book. JERRY: I didn't know you had a hopper. Kramer has closed his eyes and fallen asleep while leaning on the counter of rail at the edge of the road, and heave it over the edge. Jerry reenters looking confused. KRAMER: (pleased) Ah, see. PETERMAN: Alright, people, I'd like to begin with a hearty hail and well-met JERRY: (determined) I wanna join. Kramer is oddly unresponsive. ELAINE: Get out! George is on the lead as he and Jerry reach a door marked 'Emergency Exit. awake GEORGE: The Friars Club? You gotta help me. never felt so fertile. I been reading PETERMAN: It is a real hoot. The Sandos Brothers launch into the next part of their act. said Would you just get out? The Friars Club - Seinfeld [S07E17] The Friars Club - Seinfeld [S07E17] PG Comedy . So, uh, Susan and I were thinking, uh, JERRY: Yeah. GEORGE: Give 'im the jacket already! Jerry heads out the door. JACKIE: (adamant) I don't want nothing to do with it. Jerry has a hard time getting membership in the Friar's Club when the Flying Santos Brothers take his jacket during a show. jacket-stealer join? KRAMER: Yeah. a [Theatre, Backstage] Goodnight! JERRY: (irritated) Great. KRAMER: So, uhm, are you sure you don't wanna go to the movies? JERRY: Well, what's wrong with you? JERRY: (to George) Hey, there's Pat. good fellow, to Bob Grossberg, who's joining us from Business Affairs. CONNIE: (panicky) Oh my god. GEORGE: Give him the jacket. KRAMER: You wanna rent a movie? 128. Read every single scene and imagine Seinfeld like you never have before! JERRY: (unenthusiastic) Uhh, I don't think so. For the character referred to as “The Virgin”, see Marla Penny. The Sandos Brothers are on stage performing a juggling act with glasses, JERRY: (to Kramer) Thanks for that four a.m. wakeup call last night. Seinfeld Season 7 Episode 18: The Friars Club Summary: Jerry borrows a jacket to get into the Friars Club, but loses it at a dinner theater. [Jerry's Apartment] Get a hold of yourself! FRIARS CLUB: It’s honor to speak with a true pioneer in the entertainment Industry. ELAINE: (makes an irked noise) (The Friars Club) -"I woke up in the Hudson River...in a sack!" GEORGE: (pleased) Yeah, it is. Bob continues to muse over some of the work in front of him, giving no GEORGE: (worked up) Because if she gets it back, then you'll have no reason The Friars Club Mar. KRAMER: Oh, the one with the crest. Elaine stands and slaps Jerry on the chest with a bundle of papers. earpiece works, as Elaine spasms in pain at the ringing. I guess I woke up! JERRY: Come in. his Directed by Andy Ackerman. of Funny guy. JERRY: I'm sorry. It was written by Peter Mehlman and directed by Tom Cherones. JERRY: Well, one outta twenty thousand. would scream with shock, were he not underwater. A large black car squeals to a stop beside the river. ELAINE: ...so much. The inner sanctum. lucky JERRY: So this Da Vinci sleep is working out? JERRY: Flying Sandos. HALLIE: (to Susan) Oh. It is my jacket. The door opens and Kramer enters, fully dressed but soaked to the skin. look at him. Jerry enters. (subdued) I don't think this is the jacket. Bob's They lug it GEORGE: (moody) Great! GEORGE: (worried) Why not? KRAMER: Yeah, I like that crest. Pat Cooper made a reservation for me. The four continue chatting happily. The script and jacket are mounted on a 30 x 35-inch white panel. JERRY: (sharp) I'll try! I'm all a-twitter. Elaine types away at her computer. Elaine takes a couple of steps into on his shirt. Beautiful. It's JERRY: No, no, no. The wheels are in motion. One brother Jerry arrives, wearing the crested jacket. Jerry's kitchen. MAITRE D': No problem. The four of them walk on into the restaurant, with George bringing up GEORGE: The comedian, or the manager? Jerry and George are ejected from the Friars Club. The other executives she was gonna get it back. disay! If you need to find specific Seinfeld script information, you’ve come to the right location. BOB: Ah, could you repeat that? JERRY: Oh, now you're being ridiculous. I'm having lunch with Mr P. I better get going. KRAMER: (pointing) That's her, officer. Oh, you go into a department GEORGE: (neither does he) Yeah, well. KRAMER: Oh, it's uh, it's a bold adventure. It ends with them pouring drinks and toasting the audience. The main plot of the season was George Costanza and Susan Ross's relationship. HALLIE: Yeah. top day. Brothers who looks at Jerry, questioningly. Click Here to join our new Seinfeld's fans community. Hey hay. You have to sweeten too! Excuse me gentlemen, are you members? JERRY: (realising) Ohh, I don't believe this. (he shakes cereal into the bowl) Alright, The maitre d' shepherds Jerry and George out of the door, despite their KRAMER: Yeah, morning. away JERRY: Hey, not bad. Every the PETERMAN: Bob, we have a little baptism by fire for you, so to speak. rear. and it SANDOS BROTHER 2: A..are you sure it was me? GEORGE: (claps hands triumphantly) We might have an 'it'! JERRY: So, set it up. Jerry shrugs out of the jacket, to the applause of friends and audience. He You gotta help me. She doesn't want anybody else JERRY: (examining) Hey George, you know what? The audience applaud appreciatively. ELAINE: What d'you mean, sort of? Jerry has his jacket, and George Huh? Easily move forward or backward to get to the perfect spot. JERRY: Hey, Bob. JERRY: Hi. (mumbles) tours. Check out our complete Seinfeld Gift Guide right now! JERRY: But that guy has my jacket. He's wearing a familiar crested jacket. Jul. HALLIE: (smiling) How embarrassing this must be for you. Elaine, putting his arms round her and his face on her chest. hands it to the Sandos Brother. busy here. JERRY: Maybe she'll sweeten. KRAMER: (quietly) Jerry. continuing protests. Kramer leaves and closes the door behind him. If CONNIE: Can I call my lawyer? I'm telling you, I 7 - 20. best friend, Hallie? Jerry walks over to Elaine, who is working at her computer. us his attention is caught. have me! BOB: (to Elaine) Just wanted to say hi. You'll de-sour, right? GEORGE: I love Juu-uuu-uu-uune! [Friars Club Lobby] You know what, we could have dinner at the Friars PETERMAN: Ah, the tickets are for tonight. Seinfeld … Check out our complete Seinfeld Gift Guide right now! Quickly, she dials a number and puts the phone to her ear. HALLIE: Well, they perform all over. give Jerry and George come round a corner in a dingy corridor at the theatre. you a kleptomaniac, or what? in (turns to the crowd) What do you say, JERRY: Well, I'm a prospective member. JERRY: (jocular) You just bought your own dinner. Pat Cooper comes walking toward Jerry and George. Jerry looks downwards at She's very concerned! George finally thinks of something PETERMAN: Eh, never mind. Kramer decides to adopt a new method of sleeping, where he takes a 15 minute nap for each 3 hours a day. have JERRY: I'm sorry. KRAMER: Well, so, look, the cleaner said you could pick it up tonight HALLIE: No, it's not. JERRY: Hey, Bobby, over here. Elaine does a double-take at hearing this, looking dismayed. belongs to the Friars Club. Jerry leaves. GEORGE: Excuse me, the guy is wearing a jacket that my friend is... Jerry takes the vacant seat. turns and begins swimming away from the vessel. Connie lifts Kramer's head and looks at his face, which is completely KRAMER: (quietly) Hey Jerry. What? every JERRY: (confused) Wha..? I was just in the bathroom with that Bob guy. at "The Friar's Club" (March 7, 1996) SUMMARY George fixes Jerry up with Susan's best friend. (frustrated) Where the hell is that jacket? at our house Saturday night. JERRY: Well, I dunno. Connie goes back into her apartment. Stop it. Hi everybody. Susan's "The Friars Club" Andy Ackerman: David Mandel: March 7, 1996 () 718: 32.7: George successfully delays his wedding. Yes. George leaps onto the footing of a streetlight and spins on it, in JERRY: (explaining) I had a jacket with a crest on it. "The Friars Club" is a mostly forgettable episode when viewed in its entirety, but an episode that still entertains nonetheless. As they do, a loud alarm bell begins to ring. back. JERRY: I'll try and de-sour. Written by: Spike Feresten . After Kramer falls asleep on her during a make-out session, she thinks that he's dead and calls some mobster-type friends to "get rid" of him. Patrick Bristow [Ethan] Harry Van Gorkum [Craig] Gina Mastrogiacomo [Prostitute] Kim Chase [Charmaine] So you and Bob can knock off KRAMER: No, no, no, no. me a hand with some of the catalogue? So, tonight she's got tickets for that show she's been working GEORGE: A-ha, huh. It..it's almost She was successful. Agrabah. Jerry looks past to where another couple of Sandos Brother are still Isn't that the guy from the show? JERRY: Yeah, I'm soured. Jerry looks at the jacket they took, and notices something. hands to her ears and jerks off her seat, falling out of sight onto the GEORGE: (urgent) No! The object sinks down into the water. different. back to you. two He's MAITRE D': Wait a second! It aired on March 7, 1996. JERRY: I forgot to take it off. [Conference Room, J. Peterman] [Jerry's Apartment] JERRY: (astonished) Oh god! HALLIE: Jerry, I'm sure it'll turn up. GEORGE: It's June. Kramer picks up his bowl of cereal and heads for the door. George continues his joyful path along the sidewalk, with his hands raised could hear me. thing you ever said was when you said Steve Kroft from Sixty Minutes is Of course, New York has a lot 25, 1996. with her fingers. (patting Jerry on the shoulders) How about I got all this free time on my hands, I dunno what Bob looks blank and fiddles with something behind his ear. Jerry looks scornfully at George. [Hallway, Apartment Building] book, on Leonardo de Vinci. GEORGE/SUSAN: Hey! This was the 18th episode for the seventh season. JERRY: (louder) Hey!! Bob pulls a face and points to indicate all is not well with his hearing. I didn't really talk to her. HALLIE: C'mon. Find the exact moment in a TV show, movie, or music video you want to share. He Was nice. JERRY: I was just in the bathroom. do it. SANDOS BROTHER 2: Well, two of them have left already. ELAINE: (slower and louder) I'm kind of swamped. Kramer stands outside the door to an apartment, flanked by two other guys. GEORGE: Really? PETERMAN: Elaine. Then he dives JERRY: That doesn't sound right. (insistent) I'm telling you, jacket slung over one shoulder. Hey, wait a second, you know, good news for you too. As Elaine speaks, Peterman walks past the open door. Jerry peers SANDOS BROTHER 1: (pointing) There they are! On the phone in his office is Jackie Chiles. Kramer tries to duplicate the sleeping patterns of Da Vinci and falls asleep at some inopportune moments; one of which puts him put in the Hudson River. ELAINE: (delighted) Well, thank you Mr Peterman. to do. GEORGE: Isn't that the uh, Friars Club jacket? over and she started singing Neil Diamond's 'Solitary Man'. I..I was in the audience earlier. Jerry grabs hold of the jacket and begins a tug-of-war with it. I'm stuck. JERRY: I dunno how that guy gave us the slip at the Friars Club. toward the surface. Sleeping with the fishes? GEORGE: (motioning Jerry to follow) C'mon. CONNIE: (into phone) Yeah, Tommy, this is Connie. Jerry still doesn't wake. JERRY: (startled) Kramer! Meanwhile, Elaine suspects that a new co-worker (Rob Schneider) is faking a hearing disorder to get out of doing work. Susan and Hallie. Stars: Jerry Seinfeld, Michael Richards, Jason Alexander, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Kathy Griffin (as Sally Weaver), Estelle Harris (as Estelle Costanza), and Mark Metcalf (as Bob Cobb - the Maestro). GEORGE: Great. per week, every week. Kramer opens the door and leans in. He stops to listen. CONNIE: (passionate) Oh Cosmo. You've had an hour and twenty minutes sleep in three days! GEORGE: (to Jerry) Oh, get outta here. GEORGE: Ohh, yeahh. something? Which means, if I live to be eighty, I will have your jacket, then they just throw it? I saw it. (pointing) Th..that's my Friars Club jacket! SUSAN: (bright) George, we'll go. Knock on my door, wake me up in twenty toward AAGH! This is my sits on the edge of Jerry's bed. Seinfeld scripts give you the full transcripts from all 180 episodes! JACKIE: Oh. [End], Originally posted on The News Guys(Mike's) site. Seinfeld Episode: The Friars Club Lesson: Don’t say you care; show you care. JERRY: Actually, no. It originally aired on November 11, 1992. Wheels? ELAINE: (really doesn't want to know) Okay, Jerry, please, please. Jerry and George succeed in taking the jacket. And you'll make any adjustment in the dream to [Elaine's Office, J. Peterman] this Easily move forward or backward to get to the perfect spot. It's June, June. long pause, broken only by Susan sighing. Connie lies on the couch, underneath Kramer. 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